Weblog » Tags » bulimia (all)

  • I haven't written here in forever, although I've been writing in my ED LiveJournal some. The truth is that, lately, I really just haven't had much to say along ED lines. My b/ping has decreased significantly in frequenc…

  • SI TRIGGERS. Read at your own discretion.

    Today was a fucking awful day. I binged and binged at suppertime, and yet didn't feel ill enough to purge. Didn't have the energy to purge, either, or even the desire. So all that food has been digesting for at least si…

  • I'm really tired right now, but a lot of it is my own fault. I can't seem to let go of this stupid b/p train I've been on. I'm terrified that if I stop b/ping, and eat normally, I'm going to gain a lot of weight. This is…

  • Somewhat short update

    I have an appointment at the counselling center on Monday. With a psychiatry resident. *groans* I don't know if it will be a good thing or a bad thing... but I guess I can give it a shot, right? I mean, will it really hu…

  • This is what it is to have an eating disorder.

    my reflection... hurts me. i am a lump of lard, a spewing, volcanic thing, erupting out of all bounds of what it means to be normal. please tell me this isn't me. i want to claw at it, break the glass, smear my blood …

  • I have a Latin quiz tomorrow, but I have not been studying nearly enough. I still couldn't tell you what most of the nine special adjectives are, or what any of them mean, and I have to know them all for tomorrow morning…

  • Eating fucked-up-ness

    What do I do? Do I attempt, yet again, to try and eat normally -- to choose mostly healthy and nutrient-dense foods -- to maybe start going to the gym on campus again? I did feel better when I was doing that. Do I try i…

  • I know... I haven't been around for awhile. Life, and some of my own issues, have been getting in the way of serious Internetting, let alone being on Xanga very much (if ever). I pretty consistently read the daily digest…

  • Every time I post somewhere that I am fat, I feel like people think I'm just saying that... that they believe I really have a totally distorted mindset, and that the fat feeling is all in my head. But when I think about …

  • The past vs. the present

    A couple of days ago I was looking through some things in a bin that I was considering clearing out for my mom to use in the yard sale they had, and in it I found my old binder from residential treatment, with all the sh…

PerfectShadesOfBlue22

  • Visit PerfectShadesOfBlue22's Xanga Site
    • Name: PerfectShadesOfBlue2
    • Gender: Female
    • Member Since: 9/9/2006

Connect

Recent Weblogs