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  • This is what it is to have an eating disorder.

    my reflection... hurts me. i am a lump of lard, a spewing, volcanic thing, erupting out of all bounds of what it means to be normal. please tell me this isn't me. i want to claw at it, break the glass, smear my blood …

  • Eating fucked-up-ness

    What do I do? Do I attempt, yet again, to try and eat normally -- to choose mostly healthy and nutrient-dense foods -- to maybe start going to the gym on campus again? I did feel better when I was doing that. Do I try i…

  • I try so hard to help other people, and then find it so hard to help myself sometimes. I try to be there for others -- give them a listening ear, maybe some gentle nudging or poking if I think it might be useful -- and t…

  • Horrible, awful, ridiculous day.

    Today has been such a horrible day, body-image wise... and I don't know anywhere else but online that I can vent my frustrations, so here it goes, I guess. So today I decided to be really fucking smart and shop for clot…

  • I don't know how much more of this I can take. I really don't. I can't even analyze what's wrong with me anymore. There's just too much of everything in my life right now. Far too much work -- work, which I hate with a …

  • I've been so, so lonely lately. It seems to hit me at random intervals... mostly when I'm home alone and have all at once become bored with what I'm doing. All of a sudden I'll just -- stop, and feel vaguely sad and down…

PerfectShadesOfBlue22

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    • Name: PerfectShadesOfBlue2
    • Gender: Female
    • Member Since: 9/9/2006

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